Saturday, August 27, 2011

The Other Side

So I finished last Thursday. Here's a quick run-down of everything that happened.

Thursday, August 17: Performed oral quizzes.

Бэки (Becky), the vain and selfish boss.

Кэрол (Carol), the hard-working secretary who sends Бэки to Brazil.
Виллиам/Владимир (William), Джессика (Jessica), Наташа (Natasha)
Джессика and Наташа played teenage girls who lie to their grandmother about being ill so that they can spend their day off having fun. 
Виллиам plays the grandmother, who hires several agents (also played by Виллиам) to follow the girls throughout their day and ensure they pay for their lie. 

Валерия (Valry), Джоси (Josie),  Кирстен (Kiersten), Катя (Cassie)
For our skit, we did a public access dating show. 
I was Борис (Boris), the cocky Russki looking for love. Or money.
Джоси  was  Анастасиа, a beautiful secretary with big dreams.
Кирстен played Товарищ Старуха (Literally "Comrade Old Woman"), an ancient, senile old woman who stumbled onto the show by mistake. She was born in 1840 and only eats soup.  
Катя was the game show host, a witty older gentleman with a dark sense of humor. 

In the end, Борис chooses Товарищ Старуха, because she owns the biggest corporation in Russia. Despite being put out, Анастасиа runs off with the host.

Oh, and Валерия  passed the class, with a B-.

We all received awards for bravery for completing our class (well-deserved!), and then I trotted home (wearing a beautiful floaty dress......and my drawn-on facial hair), and got ready to go. Things worked out perfectly. Andy showed up to get the key, and within three minutes Sean arrived to pick us up. While I talked to Andy, Sean and Michael vacuumed and packed. The drive went smoothly, and as soon as I stepped out of the car, a stiff breeze blew my dress up to my face (fortunately I was wearing bloomers, for precisely that reason). I took that as a "Welcome Home" from Ellensburg.

Friday, August 18: I continued completing my work for my independent study. It was hard, boring work.
I got an A- in the class.

Saturday, August 19: FINALLY floated the Yakima River!
Unfortunately, I don't have any pictures, but it was a blast. I perched on the front of the raft, Jeremy lounging behind me, and Sean and Lindsey in the rear. Michael was on two dollar-store inflatable pool mattresses, which barely held him above water (he weighs less than I do now, more on that later), and Jared (6'1", nearly 300 pounds) was left to fend for himself (through rapids and worse) with an inflatable pillow. Eventually things got switched around and he grabbed the air mattresses. It looked like he was coursing through the river on the back of a Pikachu. 

Sunday, August 21: Headed back to the West Side
Our friend Ryan turned 21 on Saturday, so we went up to help him celebrate, with paintball. Sunday evening we left Ellensburg, and after almost 4 hours in traffic (it is usually an hour and a half drive from Ellensburg to Seattle), we finally picked up Lindsey and headed to Sean's mom's house. I had the best night's sleep ever on her Murphy bed. 

Monday, August 22: Marysville
We drove up to Ryan's house (a very large rural estate in the woods, beautiful home, lots of chickens, cows, and other pets). After a dangerously large bonfire in the wind (which was eventually called off due to a downpour), we headed to bed. We got to sleep in their massive camper, which was awesome, because then all of us could lay there joking about what a terrible actor Keanu Reeves is, and what an awesome actor Sean Connery is. My favorite was Keanu Reeves as Harry Potter:
"Expeliarmus." You know the voice....

Tuesday, August 23: Paintball

 Here's the worst of the damage, about 4 days on. It keeps getting bigger and darker. At first it was obvious that I'd been hit with a paintball (a perfectly round, blue bruise), but now it looks like I'm being abused. I also have a big one on my thigh, two on my rib cage under each breast, and a big lump on my head. 
Conclusion: Paintball kind of sucks.

Wednesday, August 24: Rafting, part two.
This time, we thought things would be easier because there were only four of us and Lindsey had borrowed inner tubes from her mom. Things would have been well if Michael and I hadn't been paired up, and if the raft had been properly inflated. And if we would have had oars. 
Turns out, due to Michael's inability to use reason or listen to suggestions, we spent most of the float trying (and failing) not to crash into the banks of the river, which are extremely rocky and full of low-lying, pointy trees. Because the raft was mostly deflated, we managed to avoid puncturing the raft and sinking to the bottom. Unfortunately, in his generous attempt to steer us to safety, Sean got caught between the raft and our cooler (inflatable, tied to the front) and taken out completely. Not only was he clotheslined (extraordinarily dangerous, considering the speed of the current and the proximity to debris), he ended up losing his inner tube. Fortunately he's a strong swimmer, and I managed to rope him in. 

Thursday, August 25: Minnesota
Thursday morning, Michael packed up and we headed down to campus to the shuttle stop. Lindsey dropped us off on her way to work, and Sean and I saw Michael off before heading home. Sean hurt his foot pretty badly the day before, so as soon as we got home we headed to the hospital for him to get Xrayed. Fortunately he had no broken bones, but he had to ice his foot for the rest of the day.

We smoked out of the hookah again (it's not opium, just mild, flavored straight tobacco, which basically does nothing) and then I met up with a friend from class. We walked to 7/11 and back, and then discovered that he lives in the apartment complex next to me. I'm no more than 20 yards away from his front door!

Friday, August 26: Anthony, dresses, and Clayton
I gained about 10 pounds over the summer, and not in a good way. I have never really enjoyed wearing shorts, because I am uncomfortable about my thighs. But now I actually have a reason to be uncomfortable, because they are hideous. I'm not exaggerating. I have the thighs of a 60 year old woman. 
HOWEVER, because none of my jeans or shorts fit, I am forced to wear dresses - which now fit me remarkably well. Usually even my best fitting sun dresses are a bit on the baggy side, but that is no longer true. I submit as evidence, EXHIBIT A:

Dressed like this, I welcomed Anthony over and gave him his first Russian lesson. It went very well, despite my bumbling and his confusion. I hope he continues to study the language, though I'm not sure his ADD will allow it!

Sean and Lindsey headed back to the West Side again last night, leaving me to fend for myself, alone for the first time in months. I spent it cleaning, eating, and then doing a dirty job: breaking things off with Michael. I bawled my way through the entire thing, it was horrible. It all comes down to being completely incompatible for one another. I'm glad we can still be friends, though I know it will be hard for both of us at first.

To console myself, I later went for a walk with Clayton, and then coerced him into coming over and watching the first episode of Game of Thrones with me. I felt bad, because he had been up since 7 and has to work again this morning, but I fed him well (chicken pesto pasta, fresh crab dip and hummus), and Game of Thrones definitely didn't disappoint him. It was great to have some company, cos as much as I enjoy being alone, I do actually get lonely

So that is me in a nutshell lately. Katherine's coming to get me on the third, and I'll spend some time in Walla Walla. Then I might go camping with Clay and his friends once I'm home. And as far as I know, Sean, Lindsey and Michael are still planning to go to Mt. Angel for Halloween. Classes start September 23rd, and work will start the same day. I'm really excited about the upcoming school year. I'm planning to focus my research on Cold War espionage. How cool will that be?